I'm posting this from the no longer entirely crippled, entirely free software Ubuntu installation on my previously dead desktop machine. Yay! It's pretty. Thanks to
sdemory for the tip. Easiest install ever, excluding Mac OSX. I did have to install the Nvidia drivers, which (a) warned me that they're proprietary and (b) required an admin password. So, just barely more complex than reinstalling an OS on a Mac. Barely. Very happy!
Now to figure out how to get Japanese going on it.
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Now to figure out how to get Japanese going on it.